Country Strong (:

Okay the title doesn't go with the post, I was just listening to the song (;


GREAT. 


I heard a sermon by Mark Driscoll at Mars Hill's Balard Campus last year in April (I think?) with my mom and brother. 
I found it very applicable to my life, and often do a "Great check" to see if I'm on track! I hope you find it helpful (:


G.R.E.A.T.


Glorify God alone.
     -This one is a toughy. Most of the time, I think well sure! of course I glorify God.... ALONE.. ? OH. Think about things you may glorify (knowingly or not) in your day:
Drinking, sex, ungodly relationships, fighting, certain music, etc.. 
maybe look at recent FB posts and see really whom/what you praise?


Reject unhealthy comparisons to others.
     -Okay, maybe this one is tough too. Especially for girls. Have you ever actually let yourself realize how often you compare yourself to others? Compare your skin, hair, SIZE?, clothes, talents, cars, boyfriends, job,  I do it alllllll the time. If you take a minute to notice.. it doesn't get you anywhere but jealousy, and disappointment. So why do it? Once I mastered the "R" of Great, I was much happier. When I look at other girls senior pictures and wish mine were that pretty, or wish I had hair like that... why? Honestly, why do it? It just sucks. So if you reject it, just move on! You feel much better! You can't control the way you are so stop comparing!
God made you the way you are, EXACTLY the way you are, because that's how He wants you to be! So why try to change yourself when you already have 100% approval from the only opinion that matters? 


Enjoy humbly serving outcasts.
     -This is pretty self-explanatory. BUT! take notice at the word "HUMBLY" the magic word that means... Stop complaining! (: 
Reach out to others, and enjoy it! Give generously! Really... what reason do you have NOT TO? You can't take it with you when you go, so why not give to those in need? (:


Accept your life and do your best.
     -You know that fashion show where the contestants are given material and they have to create a certain piece of clothing? That's kind of how it is with life: here's what you got, now hop to it! This is how it is and how its going to be, so work with it! Do you have a bad relationship with a family member? That's just how it is, now roll with it! Accept it, and do your best, get going!


Take opportunities to redeem ambitions.
     -I like this one. A lot of times, once we get ourselves in something too deep, we think we're stuck, but really we have the power to turn it around at any time! Example: When Mark Zuckerberg was creating facebook, he was ambitious, and had a dream to create this social network.. his ambition eventually became corrupt and was ruining relationships and he went down a crazy path. At ANY moment, literally any minute, he could have chosen to just stop, turn around, and use his means for good! PETER/SPIDERMAN! When he put on the black suit, his ambitions became corrupt and evil, but he took an opportunity to redeem his original ambitions to help people and he changed his ways! (;
We constantly need to renew our ambitions and make sure our desires are on track with what God wants us to do!


Do I follow this every day? No. Its HARD, but Lord knows I'm gonna try (:

:D

Hmm. I am beyond fortunate. Beyond blessed. Not just because I get to be in another country, living with a loving family, but because I get to know the love of Jesus.

Which is what makes everything else possible.

 My best friend Karina just told me that I'm so religious, (in a posotive connotation of course) and I said "nope, just madly in love."

Honestly, I'm just in love. When you love someone, you want to be around them, you want to talk to them, you want to know everything about them. Therefore, I pray, I read my bible, I talk about Him. And in doing so, I learn so much about myself, about who He wants me to be, and about how I can please Him. 

A lot of people buy and read Self-Improvement books. There's a section for it on iTunes digital books. Self-improvement and reflection is a part of life, if we want to be successful, its helpful to read and try to change things about ourselves in order to have more friends, get along better with family members, fix a marriage, be more successful in business. So, we take time to reflect on who we are currently, we read books, we go to counseling, talk with friends, and attempt to start shifting things inside us. 

Here's an idea:

Don't buy a bunch of books: buy one.

 THE BIBLE

Self improvement is kind of just a side effect of falling in love with Jesus. 

Its kind of like a geometry proof, remember that horrible semester? (; 

 A. Because I love Jesus, I want to please him.

B. By focusing on loving Jesus, the person I become as a result of wanting to please him is exactly who I want to be. 

C. When I love Jesus, I am happy, kind, forgiving, accepting, generous, happy, and passionate. 

D. People like happy people. 

Therefore, if A=B, and B=C, and A=D... I'm sorry Mrs. Baird, I don't remember how to do proofs! All I know is that because of Jesus, I am someone people want to like! I have good relationships with friends, family, and everyone else. I have no enemies, but when I do, I love them!

One time a friend was skeptical of Christianity because she felt like you had to be happy FIRST, and then try being a Christian. She told me, "I feel like its so easy for you to be a Christian because you don't have anything bad in your life" and I told her, "Yes, I am very blessed, however.. EVERYONE has crap in their life. I have massive problems sometimes, but I'm still happy because its SO much easier to cope with problems when you trust in the Lord."

Ever wish you could just hand off your issues to someone else? You can. Hand them to God. He'll take 'em in a heart beat. When you know the Lord like He wants you to know Him, He's tangible. You can sit in your bedroom and talk to Him like a friend, because He is! He's my best friend, my brother, my boyfriend, my Father. He's everything! And I'm so glad He has promised me He'll stay forever.. cause Lord knows I need Him! haha!

You know how people always promise you things..? 

well I think as humans, we generally have learned to accept that as like a... I.O.U. with an expiration date. 

No, your boyfriend in high school won't ACTUALLY love you forever, no he won't ACTUALLY call you when he says he will. 

Promise is just a fancy word to reassure someone for the time being.

Look back on your life, was there ever a "promise" that someone REALLY, TRULY kept? 

It's a shame that we ruined the word "promise" cause it doesn't hold much weight anymore. 

GOOD NEWS!

when Jesus made a promise to love us forever, to protect us, to forgive us, to stand between His father and us on Judgement day.. oh wait, PROMISE, that means like.. legitimately, HE WILL. He doesn't mean just for a little while, or when He feels like it. He is unwaivering, everlasting, consistant! I can't type fast enough to explain it! AH!

You know how everything is better with Nutella? okay but not EVERYTHING.. cause you wouldn't eat Nutella on dirt?

but no... EVERYTHING is better with Jesus! Even depression is MUCH BETTER! haha, because you don't fall as deep when you know that God loves you and He'll pull you out! 

LIGHT!

you can't pour darkness into light.. you can close all the windows and make it pitch black but light always seeps in somewhere! You can't trap light. You can't contain the joy in my heart! Since I don't have enough room for it in my heart, I'll give you some! (;

I have so much love in my heart that I just have to give it away, because I don't have room for it all, that's what God intended for us to do! He gives us SOOO much love that we can't HELP but share it with everyone else!

and anything I know about Jesus, came from reading his blog (the bible), and from talking to him one-on-one. 

Relationships really aren't all that hard when the other end is giving 120% and all you have to do is give at least 2%. And finally! You found someone to love you that will keep promises and will stick around forever. Promise (:

20 days

I don't like how every day the number of days I have left gets smaller. ha. I've been so excited about this for so long, but now what? NOW, really? RIGHT NOW? why?..

why couldn't it have been like..2 months ago when I wanted to desperately get out of here, but no, you wait until NOW to make me leave? 

How can something be so perfect that it makes me not want to leave for something unimaginably great? 

I DON'T UNDERSTAND. 

I'm happy. Really, happy. 

Mmm.. France.

So..I leave in.. 25 days. And it's funny I was re-reading one of my posts last night when I was on skype with my BEST friend KARINA (; and I was talking about France and how I had 192 days left. It's incredible to me how fast the time has gone waiting for this adventure to arrive. well, its going to come faster than I want it to. 
God has great plans for me but what if He also has plans for me right here? I need to stop looking forward and start looking ici, here, now, maintenant. Because 25 days.. not a whole lot of time. 
The other night I was driving to Shari's and I was listening to Rascal Flatts, These Days, and I started crying, because I was homesick already. I've fallen in love with so many people recently and I don't want to let go. 


Brenna, Sydney, Connor, Dani, Derrick, Josh, Amber, Gareth, Kalli, Sabrina, Tyson, Mick. 


When you all took me in last summer, I found God where you would least expect Him. You all mended my heart, and made me feel loved and home in the strangest of places. I had always wanted to find a group of friends that was always hanging out no matter what.. and that's what I had with you. 
Then we had our ups and downs! but none of it matters now, because I feel alive and at home again with all of you. I loved last Saturday.. because we were all having issues... well except Sab and Tyson(haha!) but it was beautiful how we just loved each other and helped each other. We are all so awkward and we don't make sense but I think that's why it's so perfect. 
I don't want to leave but I love that I will always have a home with you. And I'm not sure what the future holds for this roller coaster group but I can't imagine having a future without you all in my past and present. I wouldn't be who I am without each and every one of you. 


Well, this was supposed to be about France but ya know. Since when do I talk about what I start talking about?
Its funny. when you meet someone who you think is just going to scratch the surface... but they become so much more and go so much deeper than the surface. 


 Even just last month, I couldn't have even imagined I would have these feelings, and I couldn't have guessed who I would miss the most when I get on that plane in El Pasco. 
I'm amazed at how fast this year has gone. 
A year since I met Clay, a year since Malibu, a year since I met this incredible group of people, how could it all be flashing by so quickly? How fast is the next 365 days going to go?
Where will I be? Who will I know? How will I feel?
The only thing I take comfort in: There is a God who loves me and goes with me EVERYWHERE, who has a plan for me, plans to give me a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11)


Lately, I've had K LOVE like... live streaming in my head. It's on in my dreams even.  It's the coolest thing I've ever experienced, cause I'm in constant worship. 


Dear Jesus, 
You're tight, I love you. 
Love, 
Con.
P.S. Thanks.

God is faithful.

OH MAN. (say it like Michael Polvi does)

I love that right now. 

My new favorite saying is "we'll see"... cause we honestly don't know whats coming.. so we'll see (:

I'm sick of people trying to control things. Just LET IT GO. All of it, everything, give it all to God, and just goooo. (:

He's always there, never lets me down, always FAITHFUL.

I want one (:

He's cute.

alright, Valentine's Day..

We all know the feeling.. waiting for him to call. You try so hard to look pretty, and to be funny, and do the things he likes. 


Are you waiting for him to be someone he's not?
Do you wish he would always be there for you and always ask how your day was, and always hold you when you cry, and never ditch you for his friends (or another girl)? Eh. 


Don't you wish he would get jealous when he sees you with another guy? And fight 'till the death to win you over?


Guess who already did that.

JESUS. 


He's crying because you're crying. He wishes so badly that you'd realize He's waiting for you to forget about Nick, Joe, Ryan, Levi, Troy, Aaron, Clay, Alex, Connor, Sean, Chris, Trevor, Tyler and realize that they will NEVER love you like He does..




and on Valentine's Day, when you're wishing you would've gotten roses, or a card, or someone would've kissed you..


LOOK AROUND.


God gave you FIELDS of roses, He gave you the most perfect man to fall in love with. He will never let you down, He will never ignore you when you call him, He will never leave you for someone else, He laid down His life for you, JUST IN CASE you decided you wanted to fall in love with Him too. 


He's so jealous of the boys in your life that get all your attention, He's pulling you in so desperately, just waiting for you to turn and see Him waiting with His arms open so He can just hold you.
RUN TO HIM. HE LOVES YOU. 

well, track.

Reasons to do track?

To get a tan.

To meet people.

YUP.

Well, thats over.

So my morning.. was ridiculous. God does things to make me laugh. 

I tried to pull out into traffic and ... that was a no-go.

Then my gas light came on. But you have to have money for gas. So I went to the bank, bank's closed. So I figured by the time I got over to Richland, that one would be open. I deposited a check and 20 dollars cash.. .and asked for 70 in cash.. I forgot to give them my I.D. so that took a whole 'nother "send the little thing through the tube thing" to get it to me and then I gave them my I.D. and realized... I could've kept the 20 and asked for 50.. they probably think I'm an idiot. 

So I go to the gas station and give him 70 for pump 6.

The pump stops at $50.00

Connie: The pump stopped at 50, but I gave you 70. 

Indian guy I couldn't understand: what? you give me two twenties and two fives. 

Connie: no, I gave you 3 twenties and 2 fives. 

Guy: oh, okay, here you go. (hands me a twenty.)

I walk away thinking " why didn't you just give me 20 dollars more in gas?" but I'm not going to take the time to explain it to him. 

JOSH MAIER COMES HOME THIS WEEKEND!!!!!!

(;

I'm so excited to have found my long lost husband. 

I got married when I was four to the boy who lived next door to me in Yakima. 

We used to make salad with his mom's plants, she didn't like it very much.

But she still gave me colored marshmallows in my hot chocolate.

Then I moved here. 

Then I found him on facebook last night.

I'm going to Yakima on Saturday.. I'm so freakin excited. haha its been 11 years. 

I just got a facebook event invite for 11/11/11 at 11:11:11.. .well yess.. naturally, i will be there.. ? hahaha. i like it. 

last night, Amber and I got lost. We drove so far out of El Pasco, there was no cell reception. We were at "Selph Landing" it was nice. 

My new found love is Trevor Hall. 

Matthew 16:24 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.  What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, and lose their soul?

Its hard to remember that we don't need cell phones, clothes, a house, or a family. God will provide everything we need. If we are made up of the things in the world, we will surely lose our soul. We have to be world-less in order to fully fall in love with Jesus. 

Thought for this week: Be intimate with Jesus. Be open with him, be naked in front of him so that there is nothing between you and him, tell him honestly everything in your life. Give up everything to him.